Reading Material

Parents, extended family and friends often ask me for recommendations of resources available to parents who have lost a baby through pregnancy or newborn death.

It is natural and helpful to seek information and normalization of the torrent of emotions experienced after pregnancy loss, miscarriage, stillbirth or neonatal loss.

I did so so so much reading soon after losing Isla and felt that it helped me normalize the emotional rollercoaster and predict and manage the difficult milestones to c…

When someone dear to you suffers a pregnancy loss, it can leave you feeling desperate to help and offer support in anyway possible. Flowers are so beautiful but may not feel quite right for the situation, so here are some ideas to gift some one who has experienced pregnancy loss including miscarriage, stillbirth or new born baby death.

Gift card for food delivery service: a voucher allows the grieving family to access when needed

• a simple card of love, support and deep sympathy
• mindfulnes…

Take some long deep breaths. I know how you feel. The bottom of the universe has just fallen from beneath you. Just breathe for now. You are going to get through this.

Shrink your world

• to include only necessities and your core people
• discard the rest
• give your phone and laptop to someone else to either manage or turn off

Notify

• Immediate family and friends
• perhaps your extended family or friends can disseminate the news, so you don’t have to.

Focus

• on your self and wha…

Grief after stillbirth or neonatal loss is profound. The ravages of grief feel endless and unmanageable. You mourn for what might have been. Expectations don't meet reality. You miss your little darling, all day, every day. The grief comes in crashing waves and you ruminate on the 'what if's?' Grief emotions can vacillate quickly, with anger and guilt featuring heavily. Your relationship with friends and family members may be altered. 

Resources for managing grief include:

• friends and famil…

Worldwide there are millions of stillbirths and neonatal deaths each year. The effect of the associated grief on these families (especially mothers) is profound and can be very long lasting. The impacts can manifest in:

• loss of income through inability or impairment to work, reduced motivation, reduced productivity
• social isolation and withdrawal
• emotional impacts of sustained sadness and painful memories
  
• development or exacerbation of mental illness such as PTSD, anxiety and depression
…

How is your sleep? All the grief and sadness since losing your baby can really impair your sleep. You might feel like you are sleeping too much or too little. An average adult should have 7 or more hours of restful uninterrupted sleep every night, in order optimize mind and physical health. 

Try these sleep hygiene tips below to optimize your rest:

• avoid screens for 1-2 hours before bed
• have a consistent bedtime
• optimize your bedding: comfortable mattress, pillow and season appropriate du…